You totally do.

you smell like doody.


Who's Your Happy Bunny?
brought to you by Quizilla

I resolve to:

I normally don't post these sorts of things, but this one really is my New Year's resolution.

In the year 2006 I resolve to: Sing like no one is around, all the time! Get your resolution here

Protopodcast - Clean City

So, to be clear, I'm not podcasting. At some point I would like to start podcasting, but for now all I'm doing is posting the occasional MP3 as I figure out what I'm doing. Also, I'm not yet mixing musical tracks or providing an RSS feed just for the podcast. So, let's consider this protopodcasting.

(Btw, Jason Erik Lundberg just today posted some really useful links to podcasting how-to's, helpful guy that he is.)

This time out it's "Clean City", which originally appeared in Say...what time is it?, the very fine zine published and edited by Gwenda Bond and Christopher Rowe.

The audio quality on this one is not so good, as I was speaking into a really cheap-ass mic and recording on an MP3 player and had no control over the recording levels. Also, I'm still getting over my cold, and it shows. Nonetheless, I'm having tons of fun playing around with protopodcasting.

Clean City - MP3
(3 minutes 28 seconds, 2.8 MB)

Sword enchantment

Eee, I just came up with a cool sword for the weird beach novel! And having come up with the sword, I had to give it a backstory. Which led to the creation of another character, which led to additional possibilities for my hero's character.

And the sword will help give my hero a fighting chance. Unless he cuts himself with it and gets an infection. He's not from a sword-wielding culture. He's from the Valley. Yeah, I imagine he'll at least cut himself. But he's fastidious, so he'll probably wash the cut pretty well. Anway. I really like my sword!

Say it, no ideas but in things. -- William Carlos Williams

Well, maybe overstating the case, but ideas can certainly come from things. So, even if the sword never makes it into the book, I've already gained from its enchantment.

Scraps and kicking

What I've got on the weird beach novel so far are pages of notes, scenes, dialog, sentences. I'm happy with the description of the frozen city. I'm happy with the description of the pawn shop/museum. I'm happy with the non-creation myth told by the witch's head. I like the reveal of what's in the hat box. The jellyfish boys are fun to write. It's just scraps so far, and though I'm impatient to have a detailed road map and a stack of pages and a bunch of chapters, I like my scraps rather much. When I take the pressure off myself to write what I think I should be writing, and instead write what I want to write, it's just so much damn fun.

***

The little girl kicked the back of my chair for three hours and seven minutes, and I blame the director. If he'd trimmed the drag and fat off his movie, the stupid little girl would have had maybe two hours to kick the back of my chair. I blame Peter Jackson for the little girl. Other than the kicking and extreme tedium, I had no problem with the movie's length since I'm willing to pee in the aisle.

Four days off never seems like four days off. But I've got fun plans for the weekend, and then I get Jan. 2 off, and I seem to be over the worst of my cold (tea, hot showers, one dose of sinus medication, one dose of cough syrup, resisted the tempation to break into the Christmas Glenmorangie under the pretense of medicinal application), and I'm grateful for the four days.

Okay, there's an idiot in the coffee joint showing off by stacking chairs on his shoulders. I'm going to blame Peter Jackson for this as well.

Did I break it?

Okay. Blog moved over to my first ever very own domain, and hopefully I didn't break too much, and things can continue as normal, for some relative value of normal.

Couch, sitting and leaving

Ah, I've been having a very nice holiday break. Comfortable, quiet, and shiny, despite an overabundance of fluids in my head and tubes. Today promises to be more of the same, as I've got the day off, and tomorrow as well. Woo! There will be much coffee (and tea for the fluids), Tintin, R30 (this year's Christmas Rush), and, hell, maybe even some writing. There's a strong chance I'll be going to a novel workshop this coming Spring, which would mean some deadline pressure on the book, or at least a book, so I'd have to start 2006 with my sleeves rolled up. Which is not a bad idea in any event.

***

I gave myself an early Christmas present by registering a domain name, and soon I'll be moving my blog there. You always risk losing people when you change the location of your blog, but running it from my own site means I won't have to change URLs again, even if I switch over to a completely different blogging engine. The blog is mostly migrated over, just have some odds and ends to finish up, like new RSS feeds and the like, so this will probably take place quite soon, and hopefully people will follow me over. Follow me over, alright? Otherwise I'll miss you! Anyway, it'll be good to have my very own internet home instead of guesting on other people's internet couches.

Five

2112
Green Arrow
Biotron
2XL
Planet of the Apes Treehouse

I don't know that these are my top 5 all-time favorite Christmas presents, but I sure do have fond memories of each of them.

I still play 2112.

Three miles of snaffer snoof

I nearly put out my left eye while trimming up the tree with bingle balls and whofoo fluff when a branch suddenly and without warning whipped out and snuck under my glasses, trying to take advantage of my childlike, wide-eyed Christmas wonder. It makes me afraid to hang the pantookas on the celings and pile the pankunas on the floor, and to tell you the truth, I've never been very comfortable trimming the occupant with floof. Though I suppose getting attacked by a Christmas tree is more Gorey than Seuss.

I've been listening to the Silmarillion audiobook lately. Right now Feanor is my favorite Tolkien character. I mean, he was really a complete prick, but his dialog is the very essence of charisma. Just so much fun. I wish Tolkien had written more stories about him.

It's very quiet in the office. People who have vacation days are using them. So far I've earned about 3.75 hours of vacation time, so rather than getting an afternoon blitz on with eggnog and hard liquor, I am typing away at projects that require typing. Someday I would like a job that requires doodling on big sketch pads with pens that feel good in the hand and glide across the page yielding rich, black lines. Because that's what I want to be doing now, with some classic Rankin-Bass fare on the tube, or maybe Santa Claus Conquers the Martians.

I think I'll go get a taco.

Audio flash

I have to learn how to use a particular audio editing program, so to have something to practice with, I recorded a reading of "Flotsam", a short-short I wrote last spring. It's pretty bare-bones, certainly not anything like the production quality you'd find on Escape Pod, and I'm not very comfortable on mic. However, should you care to have a listen ...

It's about 1 minute and 45 seconds, and the file is about 1.3 megs.

Flotsam.MP3

Hosting question

Hey, I'm in need of a hosting service, and I'm thinking of going with GoDaddy, because their prices seem reasonable and I've heard of them. Anyone have any experience with them, good or bad?

The meaning of dreams

I dreamed that I was taking Excedrin to combat a migraine. Excedrin really works wonders on my migraines, provided I take it before the migraine transitions from migraine aura to full-blown migraine.

I woke up from the dream experiencing migraine aura. I got up and took Excedrin.

Thank you, dream.

***

Yesterday:

• Mall


• Unmentionably evil store that I swore I'd never go into ever again and kept my word for years, but by definition of item sought could only be obtained there, sorry for further destroying American standard of living, I suck


• Target


• Nursery


• Bookstore


• Home Depot


• Mall again


• Gourmet food market


• Other bookstore


• Other bookstore


• Online bookstore

Money flies, but I got my first paycheck from the new Day Job, so it's fun.

Crypto talky

All day long, Simon Owens has been posting short interviews with science fiction & fantasy writers at Bloggasm, and he just a bit ago posted mine. Lots of good reading posted before mine, and more to come as he continues to post througout the day.

***

Our government is aware of the serious challenges to law and order that would be posed by the authenticated existence of Bigfoot or a Nessie-type monster. From a 1977 Department of the Interior document titled Are We Ready for "Bigfoot" or the Loch Ness Monster?:

Undisputed proof of a Bigfoot might cause an immediate, short-term problem no law could handle. Word of its discovery would be flashed around the world within hours, Hysteria, fear, or panic might accompany the news in the area where the creature was located. The throngs of curiosity seekers, would-be captors, and others wishing to find Bigfoot would not only create a serious threat to the animal itself, but to public safety as well. Some officials doubt whether any State or Federal action short of calling out the National Guard could keep order in the area within the first few hours or days of the creature’s discovery. This could be essential until a team of scientists could do the necessary things to ensure the creature’s survival.

The document also expresses concern for the cryptoanimal's safety and addresses what would be necessary to get it quickly covered by the Endangered Species Act.

I swear, if we find Bigfoot and the government screws it up, I'm moving to Baffin Island.

Thinking of garlic stinking

So far at the new Day Job today I've worked on a podcast, drafted a press release, and written something to put on the back of the organization's Christmas card (which sounds remarkably similar to the press release, not very warm or Yule-ish). I've had time to eat a bananna and carrots. Soon, a break to eat the slice of pizza I brought for lunch. It's home-made pizza. Pepperoni, spinach, and fresh garlic. I'm thinking a lot about that pizza. Maybe I should just eat it now. Then, back to the press release. I've never written that sort of thing before and I'm finding it quite a challenge. Very different style of writing than I'm used to.

My little piece about Michael Swanwick's Periodic Table of Science Fiction is up at the Ellen Datlow/Sci Fiction Project.

Only made it to martial arts once this week, but I stayed for two classes. I'm happy that, in the midst of trying to establish new routines, I remembered my uniform and contacts, and most importantly, my athletic cup. Learned a new form in class last night. The footwork's easy, but the hand strikes are kind of confusing. Some weird punching, loading, chopping combinations, and some strange blocks. But it's fun when those odd, awkward, nonsensical movements work their way into muscle memory and start to feel good and natural. I look forward to something similar happening with my new routines.

Didn't get much fiction writing done this morning, so off to the coffee joint tonight to remedy that.

Busy life. Coffee helps.

Update: Nope, not pizza, but a PBJ with marionberry jam, just as delicious in its own way. Pizza was yesterday. I'm confused. Like I said, new routines.

Happy as your feet

These are the most comfortable shoes I've ever owned:



(They're Merrell Jungle Mocs.)

Seriously. It's like someone's hugging my feet. In a gentle, kind, loving way. Not in a creepy, hairy, sweaty way.

And the best thing is, no laces!

Cuz, er, I'm actually not really good at tying my shoes. My mom taught me poorly. It was like, "Okay, here's how you do this. You grab one lace, kind of make a loop out of it. Okay, you following me? Good. Now, you take the other lace and ... dothisrapidtwistingmaneuverbimbamboom. Okay? Got it? Way to go."

I love my mom, and she taught me plenty of other things, but I pretty much had to teach myself how to tie my shoes, and I didn't do any better a job of it than my mom.

So, hugging foot comfort, no laces. It's my second full day of wearing them, and I just friggin' love these shoes.

It's like my great grandad said, you're only as happy as your feet.

John Lennon mix

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.

Following Barth Anderson's lead, and a few days late, my John Lennox mix for the morning. If I have any Beatles songs for which John wasn't the principle composer, it's still his voice I associate with them.

"Cry Baby Cry"

"Everybody's Got Something to Hide Except For Me and My Monkey"

"I Should Have Known Better"

"Tell Me Why"

"Dear Prudence"

"Dig a Pony"

"She Said She Said"

"Mind Games"

"#9 Dream"

"Watching the Wheels"

"Happy Christmas (War Is Over)"

Five Weird Habits

Aaron tagged me with the Five Weird Habits meme. I'll do it without tagging anyone else, but of course anyone who wants to can play.

Ground Rules: The first player of this "game" starts with the topic "5 weird habits of yours" and people who get tagged need to write an LJ entry about their 5 quirky habits as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose the next 5 people to be tagged and list their names.

1. If I buy a new article of clothing, I have to go home and put it on right away, and I'm apt to parade about the apartment wearing it, and I'm apt to name it something like "Happy Shirt" or "Special Pants."

2. If you say the word Copenhagen around me, I have to launch into a rendition of "Wonderful Copenhagen" as sung by Danny Kaye in Hans Christian Andersen. Well, sort of like Danny Kaye.

3. If you say the word "Jupiter" around me, I will rhyme it with the non-word "poopiter," though, fortunately, I'll usually just do it in my head. Poopiter, yes, because I'm just that mature.

4. This isn't a habit, maybe, so much as a weird food quirk, but I have to have my breakfast meat and eggs on a separate plate from my pancakes. I can get egg on my meat, but I can't get egg or meat on my pancakes, or syrup on my meat or eggs.

5. That weird thing I do with my tongue.

Bad doggie, congrats, yikes, cacophony

I know I've mentioned it before, but I just blew 20 minutes clicking Random Entry at The Encyclopedia of Arda. I don't know what Sauron was thinking, thinking he could take on Huan, the Hound of Valinor. Idjit.

***

Congrats to my friend K, who just got herself a nice promotion and a hefty raise. I'll preserve her anonymity, but many people (especially foodies) see her work every month, and she contributes taste and beauty to our world, and her new title and salary bump are both very well deserved. Class act, K.

***

Two Nomura's jellyfish. Will ya look at the size of those things?



Read about them here.

***

I am very tempted to play with Audioblogger, this dealie that lets you call in a blog entry from your phone and yack for up to five minutes, and then it posts an MP3 of your yacking on your blog, all done by magic.

But I don't just want to post audioblog entries for the sake of posting them, because content is king.

I could post entries consisting of me cursing in traffic.

I could post the noises my stomach makes.

I could hope the chicken lady comes back.

Or maybe readings of some of my story grenades, just every now and then. But why do them through audioblogger, over a phone, when I could record them on my computer under better sound conditions? I do think I'd like to try producing some of my own audio content for the sake of DIY only, because I can't outdo, say, the job Alex Wilson did on Robots and Falling Hearts, but it'd be fun to do something. And literally phoning it in might be a way to go.

Ponder. Ponder.

One down, plenty to go

Finished first week at new job.

Developing blisters on my toes since I'm no longer used to wearing socks and shoes all day.

Made it to one martial arts class, but left directly from work and forgot to bring my contacts, so I had to fight blind, and I am very blind. Accidently kicked a guy in the face, which is impossible, because I can't kick that high. Apologized frequently and profusely, but was secretly pleased as all get out that I managed to kick a guy in the face.

No writing done. Not that I didn't give myself the opportunity, but it was all staring at the cursor.

Have to pack lunches to avoid what I did this week, which was twice at Taco Bell and once at Pizza Hut.

Despite the fast food damage, I still think I deserve a beer for finishing the first week. Got a bottle of 8th Street right here. Bottoms up.

Podcasts and Falling Hearts

My short story collaboration with Tim Pratt, "Robots and Falling Hearts" (originally in Realms of Fantasy), is now being podcast at Escape Pod. I can't wait to give it a listen!

Pulse rate

Blogger was effed last night.

So, I probably won't talk about it much here, but I am currently again working a day job. I don't yet have permanent placement at a desk, or a phone, or a computer, but I'm confident these things will come in due time, and I do have work to do, so, as I've done in the past and as almost everybody else on the planet does, I'll be struggling to balance work and writing and exercise and home and all that stuff. To that end, I'm trying, trying to cut down on web surfing, and trying to find additional hours in the day to write. It'll be fine, I'm sure.

I've become one of those writers who flits from project to project. This week, it's been the weird beach book (in which "weird" modifies both beach and book). I'm also answering interview questions for Bloggasm, a new Simon Owens project, and I've got to finish writing my little piece for Dave Schwartz's Scifiction appreciation project. And my rib finally feels well enough for me to go back to martial arts class (I really do think it was cracked), and I suddenly find myself a busy lad. Man, last week's road trip was nice!

Email notification

So, after testing a few email notification systems, I've settled on FeedBlitz. If you enter your email over there in the little box in the right-hand column, you'll get an email when I update my blog with links to the new entries. It sends out just one email per day (presumably only if I've updated), and FeedBlitz promises not to spam you. Hopefully they speak true.

I also tried Bloglet, but I've seen complaints that it's unreliable. Also, the email it sends out doesn't seem to include links to individual entries, just one link to the blog itself.

And I tried RssFwd (thanks to Mark Siegal for the tip!), which checks for updates once an hour, but it includes the entire text of the blog entry in the email, and I prefer the notice to simply include the title of each entry and a link to it.

Finally, over there in the right-hand column I've also included a link to my blog's Atom Feed.

Of course, you could just keep clicking over here using whichever method you currently use, and I will remain happy that you've clicked over here at all.

Testing RssFwd

Now testing RssFwd. Hopefully I'll stop this soon. I'm annoying even myself.

Still testing

Trying FeedBlitz now.

Second test

Sorry, really, but it's necessary.

Just testing

No, really, I'm just testing my new Bloglet email subscription notifier thing. I don't know if it works yet. It might not. It might work and be annoying. I just don't know. That's why I'm testing it.

Hm. If you're reading this maybe you should get some value out of it. Or, at least as much value as one gets out of any of my blog entries.

I could tell you about my morning. I'm drinking coffee. And there's a 7.5-lb ham in the fridge and some humanely harvested eggs (the chickens were asked politely and get medical and dental and a 401K) and I'll probably have ham and eggs later.

I don't know why I've been geeking out so much on the Silmarillion lately, but I have been. I couldn't penetrate it when I was 12-15, my prime Tolkien years. Just couldn't care about it. Now I find myself going over elf genealogies in my head. Didn't realize Aragorn and Arwen are related. Yuck.

Later, there'll be some writing, more coffee, some tedious paperwork to fill out, more ham.

Okay, then. Hope you're all having nice Sunday mornings.

Tolkien and Van Halen

It turned out I didn't own a copy of THE SILMARILLION -- must've gotten rid of it in a mad book purge -- and I wanted one, so I was pleased to find a clean used copy at Bookman's for two bucks. Up at the check-out counter, a customer was asking the clerks if they knew what album the song "Dance the Night Away" was on. Well, that's Van Halen II, of course, and I said as much. The cashier not only praised me for my helpfulness, but she rewarded me by giving me THE SILMARILLION for free!

Finally, all those thousands of hours I spent as a teenager playing air guitar have paid off.